iC: Inbox [Asgard]

[bythewaves]

My apologies for my absence
The wind may wander as it wills, and so betimes do I
If you wish, you may leave me a message

Comments

[digophelia]

Yes, I did, as well as advised her you were reluctant to take on the younger.

[ But her? Alice is upset. ]

I know she does, but she does not know, she's still very young. I'd rather take a strike than to see her fight. I'd rather be in her place.

[bythewaves]

I know. [ Soft and sad ] As would I, you know that. But if we are not there? What then, little butterfly?

[digophelia]

Well, it won't happen! I don't want to be apart from her, I'm going to make sure of it!

[bythewaves]

You can no more promise that than I can, gwilwileth. Not all the good intentions in the world can assure you that you will be there in time.

[ soft and pained - how many times did he not get there in time? How many times did he fail his family, his men? ]

[digophelia]

No.

[ She knows, oh, how she knows. The years she wished she could have saved her family outweigh her own age. She's pleading with him silently, until it finally comes out.]

I'm angry that she was taken up as a student in the first place! I'm very angry; adults are supposed to care and protect children, so that they can feel safe and protected. I resent them! I don't want her to see horrible things, but everything so far has prevented me.

I don't want her to become like me.

[bythewaves]

I know. [ Soft and sad and gentle ]

Yet I can no more refuse her than I could you, or Clementine, or any of those who came to me with open hands and begged 'teach me how to survive'. War is never so kind, Alice. If I do not, she will seek it anyway from others - she has your fire. At least this way I know that she will be as safe as I can make her.

[digophelia]

But they're children.

[ She knows it's silly for her to say that when a few people in Asgard (even Will Graham) look at her as such. ]

[bythewaves]

I know. [ And that is all he can say, for it is true that war is never kind ]

I will do my best by them, Alice. You know that. But if not I, they will either learn from another, or not learn at all. And when the War comes for us...

[digophelia]

I would rather it be me.

[ She wonders why it can't be her and her only. ]

I was that age when I lost my family; I dread to think that the same could happen to her as it has to me.

[ She pauses, taking in a breath. He has her trust, he's one of the few. He's become a father figure in a way, which makes it easier for her. She speaks low and softly, because it is really a secret. ]

I shall tell you secret, Mr. Maglor, I thought that if I were to protect the little one from harm, that perhaps I could stop it completely from happening, at least in another world. She can grow to be happy and healthy, she'll never know that agony. And her sister, too, her sister could live and never worry about being harmed. Lizzie deserves that much.

[bythewaves]

And I, myself, over all of you. [ What right has a kinslayer to happiness? ]

[ He listens quietly, then, gently ]

It will not be the same, Alice. It cannot be - it is already different, you see? You are here, with her. And if I teach her - as cruel as it is, then it cannot happen to her, for she will have the skills to prevent it.

[digophelia]

[ Not Bumby, she feels, not him again. She tries to rationalize it in her mind once again. Being the stubborn girl that she is, she's shaking her head.]

You won't reconsider? The little one shouldn't have been taught these things in the first place. I could derail it, it won't happen in her world.

[bythewaves]

I could. But she would seek elsewhere Alice, and would you trust another with her?

[ quiet and sad ]

[digophelia]

[ He has her silent in thought. If Alice had her way, anyone young as Ame, Clementine, and little Alice wouldn't be allowed to fight. Even Riley, Ellie, and many more. ]

No.

[ Still, she pleads. ]

She's seven and a half, Mr. Maglor. She grew up sheltered by her family and there are no siblings her age, they're all very much older than her. She doesn't understand the most grievous things and if she was exposed to it, her little world will crumble. I implore you, please keep that in mind.

I only took up a knife to defend myself from those who abused me.

[bythewaves]

I know. [ it is a barest murmur, and Maglor aches to offer her real comfort, but there is no promise he can make and they both know it ]

I will be as gentle as I can, yenya - but if she is to learn, I will make sure she learns well. If tis any comfort I hope to keep her to ranged weapons. She has Drawing Lide, true? Her pets will be good guards - a flying mount wilk keep her as safe as any can be, in times like these.

[digophelia]

[ Before she starts to protest, Alice stops, setting back into seat to glower in disappointment. ]

Do you promise? She may be another version of me, but she is truly a sister to me.

[bythewaves]

[ He shakes his head at her ]

I can promise very little, Alice, you know that. But what may be done, that I will do. I will keep her as safe as I can.

[digophelia]

Please?

[ This is a pitiful plea on her behalf. If Alice had her way, she wouldn't allow it. Her desperation to protect her sometimes clouds into darker territory. ]

[bythewaves]

What can be done, that I will do. [ He promises - it is the only one he knows he can keep ]

She will be as safe as I can manage, yenya.

[digophelia]

That's my job, Mr. Maglor.

[bythewaves]

And I have a share in that now. Is that such a bad thing, little butterfly?

[digophelia]

[ She says nothing, turning to glance over to something else. She doesn't say that it is a bad thing.

She's terrified of losing everyone again. ]

[bythewaves]

[ He knows, he'll sit here waiting patiently until she's ready to face it ]

[digophelia]

[ Alice is almost incapable of lying to another; she won't lie. At this point in time, she can't answer it, not with her short temper and the anger that she feels for that question. The whole situation. For a moment, Alice wonders if it was ever worth doing what she could to protect the other girls. It's the story of her life. ]

So life is a series of unfortunate circumstances and I am, as always, fortune's fool.

[bythewaves]

You have never been anyone's fool, Alice [ he corrects gently ]

Unfortunate as they have been, you would not have survived them if you truly were. When I first came here, there was one who gave me courage - River, was her name. Do you know? She was broken, as badly as I have ever seen, but she danced still, a bird with clipped wings. She told me, before Asgard took her away, that she was glad that things had happened as they did, because they allowed her to befriend me. I will always grieve my past, and yours also - yet, I am grateful, for it has made you strong, gwilwileth, and it has not broken you.

[digophelia]

[ Alice would say that she is broken. As usual, Alice feels that she is unworthy of such affection. She'll just take this a slight defeat, knowing that he'll treat the children appropriately in training. ]

I am glad to have met all of you, too, Mr. Maglor.