bythewaves | iC: Inbox [Asgard]

"Papa told me to leave," She finally admits to him, exposing the route of her distress, "He told us to get out while we still could! I could hear him... I could hear his voice there in yours."

Still, she cries, knowing very well it's an irrational fear, an irrational thought pattern, "I don't want to lose you."

"And I reminded you - oh yenya, I am sorry. But your papa and I ... we both would chose you over ourselves always. I cannot promise that you will not lose me. Not when we go to war - but I will fight to come back to you Alice, always."

She feels like a child each time she shakes her head at his words. They're so hard to accept and they will be something she will go against. Alice clamps her eyes shut finding herself too angry to look at him. This isn't something she wants to hear; she rather have him promise not to get hurt or leave so that he won't. Alice doesn't come out and say it, of course.

He knows. But he cannot and will not make a promise he can not keep, and so he says nothing, only staying there on his knees in front of her, hands cupping her face as he wipes away her tears.

It's a few more minutes before Alice can respond. She isn't about to take no as an answer, being stubborn as she is. Alice allows him to cup her face as a reassurance this is still reality. Even now, she finds herself wondering if dreams will fuse with reality.

"I'm not leaving you again, I don't care what you say to me. It's a promise I intend to keep."

Edited 2014-09-08 05:44 (UTC)

"Have a care of making such promises, yenya. No good ever comes of making promises you cannot be sure to keep - You may have no choice, Alice."

A sigh. "Oh Alice. I have no words of comfort for you. War is always cruel."

War is cruel he says, but Alice would argue that life is cruel and she has grown tired of it. When Alice manages to speak between hiccups and tears, the admonition she gives to him is still strange for her to say out loud, "We think of you as a father," Kevin seems much more comfortable being frank about this than Alice, ironically.

For her, it took a while; after some time, his mannerisms reminded her of her father, "I just don't want to see your hurt anymore. I don't want to lose you, too. I don't want to wake up and have everything gone again. I want to fight beside you."

It still brings a bright burn of joy when she or Kevin says it, but his smile is sad. "I know, and I am ever grateful for this blessing. I do not want to see either of you hurt either you see, and so we are at an impasse. I will not send you away unless I have to. I cannot promise more than that Alice, do not ask me to."

"Please, let me go with you!" With desperation, Alice's trembling hands awkwardly cling onto his. She's still in tears and trembling with an overwhelming fear that he may vanish and never come back.

"I don't want to go back to London!" And Alice finds herself caving at the irrational thoughts, almost literally falling against him. "I want to go with you, please let me help you!"

"Oh yenya" He lets her cling, wishing that he dared to drag her close and hold her, instead contenting himself with running gentle fingers through her hair.

"I know, I know. If there is any way to bring you with me, beloved, I would, I will, this I swear."

That is an answer Alice will accept. Slowly, she warms up to tentatively resting her hands on his shoulders until it turns into an embrace that's not desperate. It's a hug and she'll allow the close contact this once to say "thank you", instead of "don't leave me".

He stays on his knees, and his hands curl around her comfortingly before one goes back up to card gently through her hair, and he hums gently.

Peace and Comfort

She feels small again, like a child as she freely braces against him. He's so tall and Alice already feels terrible for having him kneel like this. She isn't sobbing as much, her weeping has grown quiet as she slowly becomes more and more accustomed to being comforted like this. She's come a long way from hiding from him when he first found her.

If she was Kevin, he would pick her up and carry her inside, but as comfortable as she has grown with him, he knows better than to move such without necessity. He does not mind the kneeling, after all - and he can wait out her tears until she is calm again.

After a few minutes longer and Alice having her worries sated, she begins to calm down as her hands awkwardly rest on his shoulders. No more hiccups or sobbing, Alice finally opens her eyes to look through the dull lighting of the house. Maglor doesn't have the scent of the sea she's grown fond of, his trademark scent.

Just soot and ash complete with the dust of Muspelheim. It's then her heart swells with relief that he came back safe and sound and wasn't engulfed by flames. Her shoulders drop and Alice lets back one more relieved sigh, closing her eyes and recounting her father hugging her when he came home after a long departure. Slowly, Alice withdraws her hands away and straightens up. It's a miracle that she managed a hug this long.

Edited 2014-09-12 05:11 (UTC)

Maglor lets her go when she straightens, smiling a little. "There now my butterfly - dry your tears. All's well now. Shall we go in and break our fast?"

Alice has finally calmed down and there are no more tears rolling down her pale cheeks. She doesn't respond like she usually would with a faithful response of yes or tails behind him. She can't describe it, she's been far too shaken by Maglor's actions and no matter how much she tells herself not to be upset with him, she is. It will subside after a night if she sleeps well.

There's guilt building up as Alice silently shakes her head "no". She cares for him, but it is unfortunate that this has triggered an old wound. Her throat raw from the hot air in Muspelheim, "I am sorry," She breaks her own silence, choosing to look at his feet, "But I am tired, I would like to rest."

Maglor only nods and gets up, offering his hand if she wants it. "Come then - get you to bed and I will make you supper. Something light, hm? And then you can rest."

Alice nods softly in affirmation, turning on a heel to her room. It is just as she left it, even if it felt like she hadn't stepped foot in there in years. How befitting it is when she enters through the organized chaos with her drawings spread all over her old stuffed rabbit, and her dog sprawled on her back her father's eyes seem to glisten in the little light from the window in the portrait. She only stops, for a moment, with her boots and stockings off to gaze up at him and the rest of her family. She keeps them above her bed thinking that they will now watch over her sleep now.

She wishes she could have a verbal reassurance from her father, some sort of confirmation that he is fine with handing her off in the care of another, but it won't come, at least not when she's awake. Eventually, Alice is in her night gown and her own shawl, right underneath her family's portrait.

He taps at the door and pushes it open. He's made her chamomile tea and has the last of the berry cakes on the tray. Setting them down he smiles at her sadly but makes no move to touch her unless she allows it.

"Rest, Alice. I will be on the roof if you need me."

Alice doesn't make the motion to stop him, even if she turns to look at him. Alice will always be strict on not wasting food as they all know. She won't let it sit there even if her appetite has a history of plummeting when she's hungry. Alice silently comes to night stand to see what he placed there. Something of a soft smile comes to her lip as she sees it.

Berry cakes seem to be his trademark around here she's come to noticed. Already drained, Alice graciously finishes it along with the tea. Once she is done, she burrow underneath her covers, as always, with her stuffed rabbit and other toys with her all over the bed. It's childish, sure, but they're things of comfort and the rabbit means so much to her.

He comes in to collect the dishes later and smiles to see the bundle. For a little while, he sits and sings, low and sweet and soft, weaving gentle dreams of starlight on the waves for her before leaving. She never sleeps through the night, he knows, but he can grant a little rest, for a while.

iC: Inbox [Asgard]

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